Discuss whether you agree or disagree with this contrast between friendship and romance.

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    The study of the philosophy of friendship provides us with an  opportunity to examine the distinctions between romance and friendship.

     

    Plato believed that eros, or intimate love, can  inform both our friendships and romantic relationships. Indeed, he  believed that it was possible to enjoy a deeper friendship, through a  romantic partnership, as long as one did not allow the sexual component  to overshadow the friendship. This takes both great effort, and the  passage of time, to redirect eros into higher pursuits. Nietzsche was more skeptical that this type of friendship was achievable. He shares:

     

    Here and there on earth we may  encounter a kind of continuation of love in which this possessive  craving of two people for each other gives way to a new desire and lust  for possession—a shared higher thirst for an ideal above  them. But who knows such love? Who has experienced it? Its right name is  friendship (p. 60).

     

    In today’s world, there is a growing focus on friendship in marriage,  although there is also the belief that the two kinds of relationships  possess very different properties. Your text summarizes this in the  following:

     

    It might be said that friendship  is calm, reasonable, harmonious and sober, whereas erotic love is  spontaneous, irrational, wild and orgiastic. Or that friendship tends  towards the mind, conversation and the spiritual, whereas erotic love is  nothing without the body, touch and lust….friendship tends to be  reasonable, whereas erotic love is irrational; friendship warms to the  mind, whereas sexual attraction wants the body; friendship must be  reciprocated to make sense, love need not; and friendship is mostly  virtuous, whereas eros can be murderous (p. 51).

     

    In this week’s reading material, the following philosophers discuss  their views on this topic: Aristotle, Camus, Plato, Mill, Nietzsche and  Russell. Make sure to incorporate their views as you answer each  discussion question. Think about how their views may be similar or  different from your own. 

     

    • Discuss whether you agree or disagree with this contrast between  friendship and romance.  Do you believe that this distinction between  friendship and romance is accurate?
    • How does one reconcile this distinction between the contemporary  notion that marriage should be based on friendship first? Is that  possible or is it more feasible to think of them separately?

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